You cant have him

Its happening. They are coming for my baby. When they came for Tommy it was horrible but the only thing that made it better was my sweet baby in my arms. We would drop Tommy off at his school and we would head to the only place open at 7:45 in the morning....TARGET. For the last 4 years Jimmy has been my constant companion. He has gone anywhere and everywhere with me. He is one of those kids that can adapt to any situation. Every waiting room, every store, every thing I have done in the last 4 years my buddy has been with me. When Tommy decided he was over holding my hand Jimmy never let it go. To know that he will not be throwing his door open at 2:30 every day and running down the stairs in his little underwear wanting a snack is breaking my heart. Will they know he wants to eat IMMEDIATELY when he wakes up, that he never likes to have clothes on, that his favorite snack is pudding....Are you telling me that its over...its just over? Everything I wanted my entire life and then I got it and now...its just over. THATS HARD TO SWALLOW. Sure I will be picking him up at 2:45 to go get Tommy at 3:45 so by the time we get in the house it will be time to start dinner and Daddy will be coming home. In time I will get used to this but at the moment my world is falling down around me. In a blink of an eye they are both gone. I can say one thing. I have been truly blessed to have been home with two of the most amazing boys a Mommy could ask for. I have had moments with them that can not be put into words. Rainy days with books and cartoons, sunny days with bikes and hoses, days with time outs, days with trips to Home Depot for locks on refrigerators, days at the Library, days at the parks with picnics, days dropping them off with Grandma and doing the happy dance down the road, days I would do a thousand times over.